I believe every interaction we have is intentional. I believe there are lessons and growth within each interaction. But, how do you know if a person is correct for you? to stick around?
Relationships involve an exchange of energy, when someone enters your field, feel your body. What is your body saying to you? Does it feel magnetic, repulsive, drained, or energetic?
Then, what part of your body do these feelings come from? Since I have learned about the Human Design System and my own incarnation and vehicle, I started following my true inner authority- which is splenic. This means that within that second of meeting, or having a question asked, or entering a place, my spleen will let me know instantly what is correct for me and what is not. It is the awareness center of survival- the most basic human instinct.
Since i have been operating correctly through my awareness of this energy, I not only have been able to stabilize my energetic body, watch experiences that come to me that would have before allowed me to enter past cycles and lessons, as well as truly integrate into a higher state of consciousness.
I am able to be present. When I connect with someone, I am instantly able to know if it is safe or not. The interactions we yearn for as humans are the ones the potentiate our highest potential, and if that person can not, or will not meet you at where you are at- LET THEM GO. I have learned so many hard lessons with giving my power away to others, I have allowed myself to get lost in another, I have completely lost my identity, I lost myself, and my mission and purpose here on earth.
No longer will I not show up for myself.
Now I am not saying there isn't value in other relationships- Ive learned my best lessons by being with individuals who don't value me, and you know what- that was a direct reflection of myself!!
Everyone is a mirror of ourselves, and show us where we are at and what we are allowing. We teach people how they can treat us. So often we blame another for treating us like shit, but seriously- we set those lack of boundaries and allowed ourselves to be treated that way. There is no one to blame but ourselves. We had let ourselves down.
Now GUESS WHAT!
We no longer have to live in that way!! We can close the door, lesson learned, and move forward with our experience. Be grateful for what you have learned with that individual, and the awarenesses that came from that. REMEMBER- YOU DON'T OWE ANYTHING TO ANYONE EXCEPT YOURSELF!
So who is correct for you? Well, one who shows up as themselves. One with the intention to show up as themselves, for themselves, for you. Unattached to the outcome of the relationship, with an intention to love and support you- BUT ONLY IF THEY ARE LOVING & SUPPORTING THEMSELVES.
Remember, someone can't give you something they are not already giving themselves. And, watch out for the ones who try and tell you otherwise, for they are acting out of co-dependency and their wounds are still unhealed and unconscious, which will only remain dormant for so long until they start projecting those wounds onto you. By then you will have grown attached or think you love them because of what you think they have done for you, or what they make you believe they deserve because they were there for you.
Truly look at the situation and where you are at in your life when people enter your field. If you are hurt, and going out looking for someone, guess who you are going to meet? Someone hurt to share your hurt and create more hurt with. More lessons.
I have gotten to this point in my life where I know my value. I had got out of a very difficult abusive relationship in August, which left me robbed of monetary, 2 companies I built, my dog, all of my belongings, and nothing but myself and my clothes. But do you know what I did have? I had my purpose, I had myself, my awareness, and peace within. I took with me my strength, independence, and self love. Something I didn't have before that relationship.
I had learned some of my most valuable lessons in that relationship. I then dated another guy in the fall, which showed me even more! He was a great person. He showed me a healthy way of being loved and valued, something I hadn't experienced before. He also showed me again, what I need with a partner, and I need someone I can grow with, and be challenged to continue leveling up and become more of the best version of myself.
It was hard for him to understand why I had to let him go, but I know so much was activated in him, and for the first time in any of my relationships, I was able to lovingly leave them with nothing contributing to the break up except for my need to serve my purpose and dive even deeper into myself and be able to hold space & show up for others I am here to work with. I wasn't fulfilling all of my commitments I made to myself, the relationship was safe, but my purpose was much greater then the false sense of safety in the 3d plane. I needed DEPTH, I need to go deep down into my darkest shadows and talk about that as new awarenesses arose.
Discovering this freedom within myself, to be authentically me, and to not be scared to be alone has been the most empowering time of my life (thus far ;)
Now with this knowing of what I truly desire within a partner, I am aware that the energy I put out comes back to me.
I do not have to subject myself to any more bullshit lessons I should have learned 5 relationships prior, I do not have to lose my identity in order to be loved, I do not have to show up any other way except as myself, with the intention to want to grow, support and love myself and another.
The only person you need is yourself. You cannot save anyone except yourself. You do not owe anyone anything except yourself. If a person enters your field who understands this, is living authentically, loves themselves, and is actively taking their own inventory and aware that their growth is never ending, let that person stick around and see what mountains you can climb together.
Since I AM committed to myself, the people who have entered my field this year have been able to go to the depths with me, and reflect my love, beauty, and most importantly- my STRENGTH!! Sure I have had a few people surface to test my boundaries and allow me to practice my strength and communicate my feelings, which I am so grateful for.
Everyone is a lesson & mirror, just show up for yourself, and feel into yourself to know what is correct for you.
In Love & Light,